This week was a week of facing the reality that there very well may be a day that I don’t have neither my mom nor my dad here on this earth with me! I lost my mom January 6, 2012…..which still to today has me heartbroken and I miss her everyday! I still find myself trying to pick up the phone to call her when something either happy or sad happens. I somehow have been able to push the thought of one day, unless God has other plans, that I will also lose my father…..Will I then be an orphan? That is what I feel like I will be. My dad just returned to his nursing home room from being in hospital with pneumonia and kidney failure….I stayed with him during the day each day of his hospital stay…except for the last 2 due to I got ill! When I went to see him this week….he looked so frail and was not wanting to eat nor could he hardly stay awake. At this sight is I guess when I let the knowledge resurface that he is in his 80’s and not doing well. I have to accept that there is a good chance that soon I will no longer have him here on the earth with me!
I also came to the realization that my auto-immune diseases Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and Fibromyalgia is real! So real that I can only push myself so far before it puts me down for days…..Fighting these diseases along with Major Depression Disorder with Panic/Anxiety disorder….is so hard….most especially when so many people doesn’t understand….even though I might look okay on the outside….the inside of me is screaming.
The week did end on a very good note….When I went to see my father on Thursday…he was doing so much better. Then after seeing this, myself and my husband went to spend the rest of the day shopping in Tyler Texas…We had sushi at one of our favorite restaurants, Wasabi! Went to Marshall’s, Michaels, Target, Ross and more! I share all this with you in the below video! Hope you enjoy!
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